Week #1 (March 20, 2020)

Today was the end of the first full week in self isolation/social distancing days. It is so hard to believe that it has already been a week because things were changing so fast daily.

I decided it was best to self isolate Shawn and my mom, who I moved in with us temporary til things get better. I am the one that is running out for essentials while practicing social distancing. I can’t believe a whole week has gone by, it’s been crazy what is happening. We have gone from travel warnings to school closures to business closures to border closures all in one week. I mean I’ve been seeing this and hearing about this coming but in no way did I ever think that this would happen.

Not only has life as we know it been changing rapidly but so has my mood. I have gone from scared to frustrated to angry to acceptance all in one week LOL. I started finding myself becoming a very angry person at so many people and I had to take a step back because that’s not gonna help anybody. I guess we all deal in different ways most of the time. I am good at laughing things off but with so much unknown it really is messing with my mental health. At the beginning, I was worried that one of us would get sick and Shawn’s staff would stop coming in. We were given strict requirements that they would cancel if Shawn or anyone in the house had a cough. Well last weekend we had a close call. One of the personal support workers that comes regularly was sent into quarantine for close contact with another patient who may have COVID-19. She was scheduled to come to our house that day. That scared me enough that I made the decision to cancel all staff that does Shawn’s morning and evening care for the time being. We do have a full-time private person who comes Monday to Thursday for six hours a day so I do have some relief. So not only I am self-isolating but I am doing continuous transfers with doing all evening and weekend morning and evening care. The scariest part is not knowing how long I can physically do this on a long term basis. We have six people living under this roof right now and I am going completely insane already. (Shawn and I, our three kids and my mother has moved in). We also have the two dogs and two cats so it is noisy and busy and I am dreading the next few weeks. However, I am just happy that I know that all my loved ones are well looked after. So we haven’t done much of anything all week like everybody else it seems. I’ve made tons of plans of stuff I want to do around the house but I’ve done absolutely nothing LOL. Pretty much I have been eating and drinking and watching TV and if I keep this up I will be 300 pounds very soon. So how do I keep things interesting in these uncertain times? I have no idea. Right now I think we’re all just trying to learn how to adapt given our new situation. I’m going to have to come up with some sort of ideas for my family before I cannot handle them all being around me all the time. LOL. I bought my youngest some Lego to do and we came up with some Lego challenges that he can work on. Shawn pretty much is in his glory when he can play Word Searches on his iPad all day long. By the end of week, I’ve stop watching the news so much because we were all getting a little obsessive about it. I’m trying to be very aware that everyone’s going to need fresh air and exercise. It is a little hard to do with Shawn and my mom in the cold so I take them on car rides. Anyways I’m sure things will get worse before they get better.I am thinking about all the other caregivers out there and the extreme burn-out we are all going to be facing in the coming weeks. I have a lot of anxiety about it but there’s not much I can do at this point because I have to keep my loved ones safe.

This week:

I signed up for Tic Tok

Made a spring cleaning list

Bought my youngest a big LEGO set

Moved my mom in

Cancelled all staff except our full-timer

Went from being cautious to pretty much self isolation

Cancelled all appts that were about to be cancelled anyways

Fought with friends about what was happening

Made up with friends

Had the last indoor socializing with friends for awhile

Chanelle moved back home to help with Shawn’s care